A new challenge…

So… What’s new I hear you ask? Well I thought I would start by bringing you another completed challenge from my course ‘writing 101’. The following challenge was presented to us along with the following twist:

Today’s Prompt: A man and a woman walk through the park together, holding hands. They pass an old woman sitting on a bench. The old woman is knitting a small, red sweater. The man begins to cry. Write this scene.

Today’s twist: write the scene from three different points of view: from the perspective of the man, then the woman, and finally the old woman.

And here is my finished article:

As they entered the park after what could only be described as the morning from hell, Nathan and Sarah prayed that this feeling of emptiness that engulfed their soul’s would soon evaporate. As he reached for Sarah’s hand, a smile if only brief, appeared on her face. Nathan was her rock and if anyone could make this better he could. As Nathan glanced to his right, he noticed a lady sitting comfortably on a bench. A needle in one hand and a ball of red wool in the other she appeared content. In her element. On her lap lay a small red knitted sweater which he assumed must have been for a small child. A doting grandma he thought. She looked up as they passed making eye contact with him. She smiled. A lump filled Nathan’s  throat which was soon accompanied by a tear rolling down his cheek. He envisaged his grandma in that same position all them years ago. Only it was his red sweater that lay on her lap. As he looked away she could tell of his broken heart. A three second glimpse into his tear filled eyes was all she needed to feel his pain. As she peered down at the un finished sweater and smiled, she was blissfully unaware of their loss. Her hand made creation would soon be warming a small miracle. A miracle that Nathan and Sarah had so selfishly had to part with that very morning.


Let me know what you think guys. Hard hitting I know. I hope I’ve done the task justice and created just a snippet of what the story could potentially become.

I will be following this up with a post over the weekend to give you an update as to where I am up to with the novel.

Thanks again to all who are following and please continue to spread the word.

Take care and happy reading!
Mark
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4 comments

  1. revdrl · April 16, 2015

    This is a poignant, bittersweet kind of story. Thanks for sharing.

    Like

  2. Andy Draycott · April 18, 2015

    Well written Mark. A good twist at the end. I was wondering if the story was going down the road of the couple not being able to have children. Equally sad. Keep the imagination going and the ideas flowing, you obviously have them.

    Like

    • drakes1 · April 18, 2015

      Thanks mate! That could well have been another hidden meaning. In my head they had just lost a child. That’s the magic of story telling and leaving an open ending. It’s up to the reader to interpret and to discover their own ending. Speak soon!

      Like

  3. Casey · May 18, 2015

    Writing 101…Just a quick proofreading note (I’m guessing you don’t write American English, which may account for the difference); many of your sentences are choppy, which makes it a bit difficult to read. HOWEVER, I also understand that in-country, this may be the way everyone writes, so it might not matter, but in general, if you don’t have a full thought in each sentence, you may want to combine or re-work them. Overall, great piece.

    Like

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